Desire

DESIRE often conceals a complicated agenda – much in the way the word “want” has 2 definitions – to desire and to lack.

Combine these two meanings and you get the essence of longing – to desire what you lack.

To understand a person’s desire, you must first identify the lack it conceals

Bro's Thanksgiving Dinner

Parents hosted a gathering to give thanks for Yew Jin getting into Malaysian Airlines as a cadet pilot. Yay..cheap tickets anyone?

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Love Complicated... Is it?

“I am confused. I don’t know what to do. How?”

When someone asks you that, what do you say? What can you say? They come for your advice, you try to give the best you can; and then they say that it’s so complicated. Is it really?

Do you choose old love or new love? Faithful love or passionate love? Do you chose someone who has been there for you all these years, whom you know in and out; or do you chose someone who is new and exciting, someone you don’t know all that well but want to know because that person has potential?

Love is all about taking risks. It’s about a leap of faith. It is not complicated. It is us humans who make it complicated. We make it complicated because we are greedy. We want everything. We want things we already have and we want things we don’t have.

At the end of the day, as many times as we have heard it before, it is all about whom you cannot live or be without. You can be with a lot of people. Come on, we humans are extremely tolerable, though some may beg to disagree. But there are not many people you cannot live without.

When you ask yourself that question – who can’t you live without, and when you imagine your future years ahead and if you can see that person’s face clearly and only if it’s clearly, you will then that he/she is the one.

Once a choice is made, you will realize it wasn’t all that complicated after all. Only then will you find peace.

Putrajaya

Went to Putrajaya to make my MyKad (new and smarter identity card) . It was about time. Mine was the colorful one. Never been there. It’s supposed to be where the new government ministries are located. The thing that caught my eye wasn’t the new buildings or the …roads but the LAMP POSTS! There are so many types of them.

Take a look:

This was one of the many bridges in Putrajaya. I thought it looked intricately beautiful

Responsibility

I want this, I want that.

Daddy… I don’t know how to do this, fix this for me etc

Life was good. Someone takes care of my every need.

Nothing to think of but eating and sleeping, and of course going to school.

Then *PUFF*…and 20 years have passed..

Wake up and back to reality.

People are counting on us. Needing things from us

Realizing now we have responsibilities…

Pasar Malam (Night Markets)

Why am I posting something about Pasar Malam?? Haha...

A little odd I know...but I really missed the night markets. I have not gone to one in years!

Mum and Yew Jin. Doesn't he look a little Malay here?

MMmmm Mamak Food

One of those things I truly miss most about Malaysia. The 24 hour mamak stores. All the Garlic-Butter Naan, Nasi Lemak, Sup Daging, Roti Canai, Teh Halia etc.

Sometimes having too many choices can be confusing.

Sometimes not having many choices can be frustrating too.

So what is it that we want?

Response to a posting - chaos/peace

Sometimes, love can be a double-edged sword. It can be chaotic and it can be peaceful or both at the same time. It can be the cause or the solution or both. Have you ever wonder whether the solution to your chaos, that little peace that you have - is also the source of it?

Decisions are nasty to make but they will give you peace . If peace is what you want, then decision is what you have to make. It’s a difficult pill to swallow, but like what your mum will tell you when you were sick, you have to take the medicine to make the sickness and pain go away. If not, the sickness will only spread and make you worst.

Procrastinating will not make it better. It is only later that you will wonder why you did not make a decision earlier.

Bro’s Tin Tin is gone!

My brother’s little tin tin (now don’t go wondering) - his little growth near his ear was removed today. I don’t know where the name came from, but Tin Tin was his term of endearment for it. It is actually a really cute little thing..haha. It’s kinds fun playing with it, you can pull it, twist it, flick it…. It is something cute when he was younger but when one grows up, it becomes something one becomes conscious of. So it’s about time it goes away.

Bro's going to personally operate on himself - not!

Viewer's discretion advised - his Tin Tin

Thanks Kiddo!

I just wanted you to know:

You were a special person in my life at a time when I never knew I needed someone. You were always there with open arms. You were more than I asked for. You brought me hope that there are better things out there and that I'm worth it and that I deserve every bit of it.

You will always remain a part of my memory of a time that I will always be grateful for.

Thanks kiddo.

Granpa’s Still Got Groove!!

Haha…Wow..I just found out that my granpa has a girlfriend!! Granpa’s 86 years old.

Wow..imagine my shock. I mean it is a good kind of shock. He’s been a widow for the past 20 years and I think he deserves some happiness.

Now the best part of this whole new news..is that that lady is about 40 years younger than him!! Let's see ..she’s slightly older than his youngest daughter – my aunt. Makes all of us wonder what it is that she sees in him. My granpa’s not exactly “strong” and all. Is it real companionship? Is it genuine? Or is she with him for the money?

Wonder wonder..

Well…whatever it is, I’m just glad he’s happy

Chris' Birthday Pics

Happy Birthday Chris!!!

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Cerelia and her baby Natalie

The last time I saw Cerelia was about 7 years ago. Time passed really fast. We were really close in high school. Were both in the States but never had a chance to visit each other. Since then, she has gotten married and given birth to a beautiful daughter named Natalie. Natalie is so adorable!!!

Natalie, Jess and Cerelia

Hello?? Anybody there??

Girls night out with Cerelia and Jess

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The Hard Questions

What are your plans? All I keep hearing from you is what you don’t want. Do you know what you want? It’s a hard question isn’t it? Okay…you don’t wanna be here..where you wanna go? Do you have a plan? Saying it all don’t mean a thing girl. Where are your plans? Let me know, if you can’t figure it out, I will figure it out for you.

There are things in life that are difficult to accept and comprehend, especially when it comes to oneself. When it comes down to one’s ability. We become complacent and stubborn. We try to run our own lives and sometimes we make wrong choices. A lot of time, there isn’t anyone who stops us. Nobody is accountable for us anymore, except ourselves.

We think we know what we want in life. We sound confident. We are sure. Then comes along a person who breaks everything down for you. Someone who asks you the hard questions.

Someone has to.

Thanks Jess

Happy Lim

My first night out since I got back - with Cerelia and Adrian. The highlight of the night was meeting Happy Lim - Adrian's 'baby'.

With Happy at the back of Adrian's truck

Cerelia and I getting a better look at the Koi ponds that surrounds Adrian's house

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What?? Was this what I liked?

One thing I can tell you for sure is that people's tastes change as they grow older.

The first thing that shocked me since I got back was my room. It never changed. It has purple/lavender colored walls, purple cabinets, pink ceiling and pink handprints (they are mine) on my purple cabinet doors. Yes...I used to think that was so cool!!

Guess the first thing on my list is to repaint my room since I have a self-imposed 1 month break from work. I needed this break after all these years.

Thoughts on the Way (2) Almost Home

Home...Almost there. Not exactly sure how I feel about it. I know it will take some time to get used to it. How long?

Sigh..guess this is what happens when one is used to being independent and live out of the country by himself/herself.

Warning to parents who are planning to send their kids overseas to study : After studying and working away from home...they may be reluctant to come home and stay home. So..be real patient with them!! :)

Thoughts on the Way (1) In Transit in Narita

Saying goodbye. Leaving everything I know of for the past 7 years. This is my life, this is ME. This is what I am leaving behind.

The funny thing is, I am used to leaving. I am used to going places. Packing up and leaving, up for new challenges and adventures. But what we don't realize is that the older we get, the longer we stay around, we leave parts of us behind. Usually out hearts.

We build ties and relationships. These bonds that we share are real and strong. It takes a lot to break them. Somtimes it's unbreakable. Therefore to let go, a lot of times we have to break our hearts.

However to move on... we have to let go.

Boy..don't we all wish there was an easier way...

And off i go again....back home to Malaysia